Good Comeback
Posted: Wed Jun 28, 2006 9:58 am
BEST COMEBACK LINE EVER
In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old
white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 p.m.
on Friday. Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious
behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication at the Gwinnett
County courthouse on Monday. The suspect explained that as he was
passing a pumpkin patch and he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin
is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for
miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone
interview. Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side
of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his
purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged
'need'. "I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented
with evident embarrassment. In the process, Lawrence apparently
failed to notice a Gwinnett County police car approaching and was
unaware of his audience until officer, Brenda Taylor, approached him.
"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor.
"I walked up to (Lawrence) and he's...well, just working away at this
pumpkin." Taylor went on to describe what happened when she
approached Lawrence. "I just went up and said, 'Excuse me Sir, but
do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?' He froze and was
clearly very surprised that I was there, and then looked me straight
in the face and said, 'A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already???'
In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old
white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 p.m.
on Friday. Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious
behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication at the Gwinnett
County courthouse on Monday. The suspect explained that as he was
passing a pumpkin patch and he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin
is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for
miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone
interview. Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side
of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his
purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged
'need'. "I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented
with evident embarrassment. In the process, Lawrence apparently
failed to notice a Gwinnett County police car approaching and was
unaware of his audience until officer, Brenda Taylor, approached him.
"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor.
"I walked up to (Lawrence) and he's...well, just working away at this
pumpkin." Taylor went on to describe what happened when she
approached Lawrence. "I just went up and said, 'Excuse me Sir, but
do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?' He froze and was
clearly very surprised that I was there, and then looked me straight
in the face and said, 'A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already???'
